BUG TORTURE, FROG BOMBS, and a LOVING PET SPIDER!
While growing up I noticed my dad had an unusual fascination with insects, gophers, and fire. One particular incident I'll call the Snail Concentration Camp is disturbing when looking back on it. We had a lot of snails one Summer so dad went out with a big, red metal "MJB" coffee cans and started collecting them. He ended up filling three of them to capacity.
Next he put the
plastic lids on all the cans allowing the snails to bake & bubble to death
in the intense heat of the Summer Sun. The stench of dead snails grew
worse and worse.. Finally, after a week he opened the containers and
buried the mess of slimy snail goo in a mass grave.
Dad also prides himself on his ability to kill gophers. Apparently he spent many Summers on his uncle's farm killing an endless amount of them. I don't know if you've ever seen a spring loaded gopher trap, but it is a mean looking thing I would NEVER want to get my hand stuck in.
Most of the time I
don't care about the gophers burrowing through my yard. I even named one
in the front yard George, but he made the excuse that a crazed gopher
might eat through the PVC pipes of my swimming pool which would cost
thousands of dollars to replace. I figured what's the life of one gopher
if in the process dad could relive a few fond memories of his youth.
Mom giggled like a school girl, called me a chicken and went ahead and snapped this glorious shot of him holding his prize winning trophy. Gotta love your parents!
Randy is a longtime friend and frequent contributor to retroCRUSH. He has managed to keep a wonderfully entertaining livejournal that is mysteriously devoid of goth poetry. If you liked this, check out Randy's articles on BEEF, The Last Atari Dealer on Earth, and Breakdancing!