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THE WORST SUPERHERO COSTUMES OF ALL TIME!

Comic books have long been a place to show off wonderful costume design.  Outfits worn by Superman, Green Lantern, Captain America, and Batman have long stood the test the time as some of the most beautifully designed hero garb ever.  But while many heroes are gifted with powers beyond those of mortal men, their fashion sense would put The Spice Girls to shame.  Enjoy this collection of the World's Worst Costumes!


BLACK GOLIATH

You know, when you're an 80 foot tall black man, isn't a costume to hide your secret identity a bit useless? 


BOOSTER GOLD

Booster Gold has the unfortunate double whammy of having a shitty name and costume.  He looks like a 6 foot spandex bottle of All Temperature Cheer!


CYBORG

You know, if I die and you have to enhance my corpse with cybernetics to bring me back to life, could you at please make me robot pants that will keep my balls from falling out?


DAZZLER

I'm sure someone thought mixing Gene Simmons from KISS with a roller disco queen was a great idea.  The only thing stupider than Dazzler's comics was her incredibly useful super power of, get this, making colored lights appear.  Shit, I can do that by just rubbing my eyes really hard.  This first issue from 1977 has become quite valued over the years, and can fetch as much as 75 cents among eager collectors.


3D MAN

This poor jerk has a costume that's half red, and half green.  He's 3 times as strong, 3 times as fast, and 3 times as ugly as any other regular guy.  3D Man's sales plummeted quickly after his debut in Marvel Premiere despite attempts to lure more readers with his sidekick, Scratch And Sniff Lad.


THE FALCON

Captain America's partner in the 70s is better known for having a fairly cool red and white costume, but he started out with this green and orange number that was stolen from an Earth Wind and Fire concert.  You can see the look of disgust on Cap's face as he sees his new partner for the first time!


NIGHTHAWK

While Batman struck fear into the hearts of criminals by looking like a bat, Nighthawk apparently hopes to subdue evil doers by making them double over in laughter when they see him. 


POWER MAN and IRON FIST

Perhaps the worst dressed duo, ever!  Power Man (also known as Luke Cage) got in touch with his urban roots by wearing yellow thigh boots, blue spandex, and a metal headband with a sharp spike right between his eyes.  And Iron Fist's wacky getup makes him look like the spokesperson for Sprite! 


RED TORNADO

Without a doubt, red and yellow is one of the most garish and ugly color combinations out there!  Why anyone would choose it is beyond me.


SPEEDBALL

Yep, its the costume only a guy who's named after a mixture of heroin and cocaine could come up with. 


WONDER MAN

From his ugly green and orange vest, to his pasty white arms, Wonder Man had a horrible costume!  The other Avengers are all looking down on the ground, embarassed for his shameful attire.


WOLVERINE

Wolverine has wound up as one of Marvel Comic's coolest looking characters, but long before he joined The X-Men, he first appeared in HULK #181 wearing this getup!  They actually gave him WHISKERS on his mask!  No wonder this guy was always so cranky!


DAREDEVIL

It's truly a costume only a blind superhero would pick out.  This yellow and red monstrosity only lasted 11 issues before being replaced with the all red version we know and love today. 

Got any others to suggest?  Email 'em to uglycostumes@retrocrushcom!

-Robert Berry
 


 


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