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THE WORST SUPERHERO COSTUMES
OF ALL TIME!
Comic books have long been a place to show
off wonderful
costume design. Outfits worn by Superman, Green Lantern,
Captain America, and Batman have long stood the test the time as some of the
most beautifully designed hero garb ever. But while many heroes are gifted
with powers beyond those of mortal men, their fashion sense would put The Spice
Girls to shame. Enjoy this collection of the World's Worst Costumes!
BLACK GOLIATH
You know, when you're an 80 foot tall black
man, isn't a costume to hide your secret identity a bit useless?
BOOSTER GOLD
Booster Gold has the unfortunate double
whammy of having a shitty name and costume. He looks like a 6 foot spandex
bottle of All Temperature Cheer!
CYBORG
You know, if I die and you have to enhance
my corpse with cybernetics to bring me back to life, could you at please make me
robot pants that will keep my balls from falling out?
DAZZLER
I'm sure someone thought mixing Gene
Simmons from KISS with a roller disco queen was a great idea. The only
thing stupider than Dazzler's comics was her incredibly useful super power of,
get this, making colored lights appear. Shit, I can do that by just
rubbing my eyes really hard. This first issue from 1977 has become quite
valued over the years, and can fetch as much as 75 cents among eager collectors.
3D MAN
This poor jerk has a costume that's half
red, and half green. He's 3 times as strong, 3 times as fast, and 3 times
as ugly as any other regular guy. 3D Man's sales plummeted quickly after
his debut in Marvel Premiere despite attempts to lure more readers with his
sidekick, Scratch And Sniff Lad.
THE FALCON
Captain America's partner in the 70s is
better known for having a fairly cool red and white costume, but he started out
with this green and orange number that was stolen from an Earth Wind and Fire
concert. You can see the look of disgust on Cap's face as he sees his new
partner for the first time!
NIGHTHAWK
While Batman struck fear into the hearts of
criminals by looking like a bat, Nighthawk apparently hopes to subdue evil doers
by making them double over in laughter when they see him.
POWER MAN and IRON FIST
Perhaps the worst dressed duo, ever!
Power Man (also known as Luke Cage) got in touch with his urban roots by wearing
yellow thigh boots, blue spandex, and a metal headband with a sharp spike right
between his eyes. And Iron Fist's wacky getup makes him look like the
spokesperson for Sprite!
RED TORNADO
Without a doubt, red and yellow is one of
the most garish and ugly color combinations out there! Why anyone would
choose it is beyond me.
SPEEDBALL
Yep, its the costume only a guy who's named
after a mixture of heroin and cocaine could come up with.
WONDER MAN
From his ugly green and orange vest, to his
pasty white arms, Wonder Man had a horrible costume! The other Avengers
are all looking down on the ground, embarassed for his shameful attire.
WOLVERINE
Wolverine has wound up as one of Marvel
Comic's coolest looking characters, but long before he joined The X-Men, he
first appeared in HULK #181 wearing this getup! They actually gave him
WHISKERS on his mask! No wonder this guy was always so cranky!
DAREDEVIL
It's truly a costume only a blind superhero
would pick out. This yellow and red monstrosity only lasted 11 issues
before being replaced with the all red version we know and love today.
