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THE 80s MAKEUP MASSACRE
RANDY REVIEWS THE 1985 CLASSIC WORK OF LITERATURE,  "THE COMPLETE BOOK OF MAKEUP"

While browsing through an old makeup book from the Thrift Store I realized that fashion for women in the 80's was all about scrunching, and teasing your hair to unbelievable heights by utilizing every hair product known to mankind. Then you have the use of bold colors around the eyes and the ever important accentuating of the cheekbones. I betcha at least one of these photos will remind you of someone who still does their makeup/hair in the style of the 80's. Without further adieu I bring you a few pages from the "Complete Book of Makeup"!

 


 

Tammy Faye Baker...the early years!  Those pictures on the top look like dancers that escaped from a Flock of Seagulls video.


It's  creepy to see a woman in real life who looks just like the old Patrick Nagel paintings that were popular in the 80's. Perhaps they weren't drawings and instead dead women glued to canvases?

She's got to have to do some hardcore Hoover vacuum sucking to get all those Cherries through that straw!

You don't usually see hair whipped to the side like that anymore!

I think her real face is screaming to get out from underneath all that coverup makeup. I remember girls in High School putting on this crap to hide their pimples and instead creating these way more noticeable flesh colored mounds on their faces.


 

Now that's a sizzlin' 80's babe!

I still see Asian women wearing these kinds of bows still. I think she's a sacrificial gift to the Hungry God. She looks like she's ready to start singing to Mothra.


 

Ah yes...the Jet Setting "I'm a Tomato" look!

Does this lady know how to use a scrunching, iron or what?

She's on the hunt, she's after you, AND she's hungry like the wolf!

What happens when you take a mix Boy George with a dash of Diane Keaton? You end up with one shitty looking lady.

Another die hard 80's hairdo. WAY sexy in a Dalmatian sort of way.
 

Lots of people had hair in front of their eyes during the 80's. I know I could barely see anything through half of the decade. All she needs is a dead goose on her face, and she'd be the spitting image of Fabio!

Wow!  Those glasses are hideous!  I think she gave these to Sally Jesse Raphael after she was done with them.

 

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