HARDCORE BODY BUILDING
Most bodybuilders are crazed bunch on a wild ride of vitamins,
steroids, massive food, and laxative intake in the quest for a perfect body.
Then there's the female bodybuilders who are often indistinguishable from their male
counterparts. A couple of days ago I stumbled upon the book Hardcore Action
Bodybuilding from 1985 chocked full o' bodybuilders in string bikinis, headbands,
and gallons of muscle oil. The title of the book sounds more like a bad porno
movie than a serious book about bodybuilding, and the fact that it's written by a
dead Kennedy makes it all the more fascinating.
I think the only contest this woman is winning is for the WORST
perm EVER. It's like she scalped Nina Blackwood before she took the stage!
These two are ready for a night out at Studio 54. The guy on the
left is none other than a grown up Meeno Peluce. I still can't figure out if
that's a headband the woman on the right is wearing or the elastic from part of
an old jockstrap I lost in the 7th grade.
Meeno in one of his more serious stances. I betcha didn't know
this was the moment in time he discovered a way to use his mouth to eliminate
unwanted body hair.
When I like to fantasize about what Wayne Gretzgy would look
like as a roided up transvestite, this picture gets me through the tough times.
Holy mother of Olivia I swear this Flashdance reject has to be
the sister of Jason Voorhees. She might be a maniac, but let's give her
credit, cause she's dancing like she's never danced before.
Margie has a great time having people throw tennis balls at her
ultra strong chest. Occasionally she swallows one or an extra cow testicle and
it ends looking like a big muscle lodged near her shoulder.
Here's the lassic "arms at side" uneasy pose. The one
on the right is a guy with a drag queen version of the
Dorothy Hamill haircut.
This guy certainly has sexy veins. I haven't seen veins
that tasty since I bought a Giants Dog at SBC Park.
This guy is just plain creepy. Not only does he look like
a bizarre hybrid of Wesley Snipes and Grace Jones, but you can see he's hiding a
ju-ju bee in his Speedos for good luck!
Meet Matt, he likes sunsets, quiet walks on the beach, and a man
with a slow hand and an easy touch.
Bill's secret to winning bodybuilding competitions was by
sucking in his gut so hard that it created an inescapable gravity vortex that
swallowed up the competition while he feasted upon their helpless souls.