It pays to be a well-known webmaster with great connections!  Not only do you get impressive offers from Nigerian royalty to help them move large amounts of cash into the US on a daily basis, but your friends from other web sites will often share hot and steamy pictures from old travel trailer brochures with you, because they know you are oh so lonely like to laugh at that sort of thing.  When Dan from THE IMAGINARY WORLD sent me this brochure from Komfort Travel Trailers, I began to get "Komfortable" indeed, if you know what I mean.  Back in the day, they liked to add a bit of a saucy side to their trailer buying clientele.

"Hi there, handsome!  I'm Suzie, and don't let these hot pants fool you.  I'd like to take you inside this trailer, show you its swingin' features, and get you to buy it.  I know a stud like you enjoys the finer things in life, and this is just the thing for a foxy dude like you!  Let me open up my door and take you into this steaming hot box of luxury, if you know what I mean!"

"Don't listen to her, I'm the one you really want to buy this trailer from.  Why just look at the way my fingernails glide over these twin firm smooth propane tanks.  They're just full of pressure and ready to explode, if they get too hot to handle, if you know what I mean!"

"Hey there, big-guy!  Not only does this trailer come with the finest lineloeum, corkboard with plywood stickering finish, and a state of the art clock that features numbers that actually flip down in front of your eyes, but you can cool down with a beverage from my ice-box.  Whoops, I just dropped something, let me bend over here and pick it up.  I like to cool off with a drink when I'm getting too hot, if you know what I mean!"

"Forget that tramp, darling.  I'm going to change into a sexy blue dress and cook you some bread.  Would you help me knead the dough?  Oh yes, the way you work it with your hands, it's gonna rise really good.  Let's put this bun in the oven and watch it cook, if you know what I mean!"

"Wow.  That was the best tasting bread I've ever had.  Why don't you sit down with me on the couch, and let's talk more about financing.  Mmmmm...your legs look extra strong on this barf-textured couch print.    Aren't the cushions here nice?  I sure would like it if you'd put your hands deep into these cushions and dig around for some spare change, if you know what I mean!"

"Enough of that shameless hussy.  Listen, let's talk this over some wine, empty cereal bowls, and oval candle holders.  I love the shape of those candle holders.  I know this might sound weird, but they actually taste pretty good.  If you just flick your tongue against the top inside part, with the sides against your lips, it's...ohhh, incredible.  I'd sure like to watch you do that, while I grab your ears, if you know what I mean!"

"Who needs wine, when you've got Tang.  Would you like to taste my Tang?  It's a bit sticky but it's oh so sweet.  They say Tang came to space with the astronauts.  Well, I'd sure like it if you came into my Tang space, if you know what I mean!"

"Oh enough of that.  Maybe we can play some games.  Do you like cards?  My favorite card games are "Poke-her" and "Pee-Knuckle", if you know what I mean!"

"I sure would like it if you'd get in this shower, tie me up, and sing Peter Frampton songs, if you know what I mean!"

"Mmmm...I'm feeling naughty.  How about you take this hairbrush and help me untangle my hair, if you know what I mean!"

"Oh looks like my clothes disappeared.  Whatever am I going to do?  What's that, you want to "have sex with me?".  GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE YOU PERVERT BEFORE I CALL THE COPS!"

"Listen, I've been thinking, I'd like to take this "transaction" further, but frankly I'm sick of being subservient to the whims of asshole guys like you.  Can't a girl sell a trailer anymore without everyone thinking she's some sort of Trailer Tramp?  Get the hell out of here, and don't come back until you can treat a lady with respect!"

"What's up, buddy?  Hard day?  Hey, let me take you inside this camper and show you my power tool, if you know what I mean!"

Mable's Unique Gifts












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