GAS SCOOTERS

ELECTRIC SCOOTERS

 

CRAZY KIDS ROOMS
 EARLY 70s BEDROOMS OF FUTURE SERIAL KILERS

Here's some classic killer bedroom designs for kids I found in the great 1970 book, "Good Decorating and Home Improvement".

The Polka Dot Insanity Room. A must have for that kid on the edge of that has everything. The crazy blue bunny on bed has light up demon eyes and screams obscenities throughout the night. And when turned, on magic ball lamp displays Bill Murray's head and opens up a gateway to hell.

No child's room is complete without an evil clown that commands you to kill. Framed drawings of parents on walls lets kids stab them obsessively with forks or darts. If you buy this collection now we'll also throw in this framed suicidal self portrait drawing of your child with bloody bleeding wrists, tape on plastic bag for the head, or a glue on rope noose.

My first Furrie on wheels is the perfect gift for the kid that has everything. Children will spend hours loving this cuddly bear. Extra big wheels allow children to get underneath and taste every piece of his bubblegum flavored fur. My first Tranny (pictured on chair) features patented lifesize velcro genitals of both sexes!  And after long tiring day of stacking up your tupperware, you can curly up with your cuddly wrought iron stage coach as you say goodnite to the cruel world.

Rip, tear, or mutilate the arms and bodies of these prize harlequin paintings. For a special treat the whole thing is human flesh flavored. So go ahead...eat up the remains!!! The tiled floor is designed for easy clean up in case your kids kill and butcher your favorite pet dog or cat.

Stuffed animal voyeur room. The perfect gift for our young future exhibitionists of the world.  Yogi Bear is positioned perfectly to stare into your child's eyes to program him with subliminal "Everyone's Against You" messages.

With this ugly blue and green color scheme even the heaviest bed-wetter won't be detected.  The special "Little Howard Hughes Nightstand" allows children to store their own feces to share with playmates. Impress your friends with Diane The Doodie Doll (pictured on bed). Push her belly and enjoy a tasty treat.

Bunk beds with razor sharp Ping Pong hazing paddles and horn instrument. It's a good thing the top bunk has a handy pencil holder next the pillow, it's the perfect thing to write your suicide note before you fall 20 feet to the linoleum death below.  And this durable AM radio broadcasts the room location to aliens who are hungry for the eyeballs of young boys and girls.

-Randy
randy@retrocrush.com

CANNIBAL! THE MUSICAL
TREY PARKER and MATT STONE'S PRE-SOUTH PARK COMEDY CLASSIC MAY BE THE FUNNIEST DVD EVER!

I can't explain how much I love Cannibal! The Musical.  There's an honest fun to it that few films have ever accomplished.  While many first films by students flounder horribly, everything seems to click with this movie, which never ceases to dazzle my friends that I get the pleasure of showing it to for the first time.  After borrowing the video of it just months ago, I promptly bought the DVD and have seen it no less than 25 times.  Cheezy gore, corny dialogue, and some of the most catchy songs ever recorded help make this a comedy classic for the ages.

CLICK HERE FOR MORE

"WOTTA DOLL!"
A LOOK AT THE TOP 20 MALE REACTIONS TO OLIVE OYL

When one thinks of sexy cartoon character babes, Olive Oyl seems to get lost in the shuffle, but the grand dame of cartoon gals is the prototype inked vixen.  Though Popeye turns 75 this month, few realize that his gal Olive, was actually a regular in the Thimble Theater strip he first appeared in 10 years prior!  Yep, this 85 year old doll was knocking them dead 16 years before Betty Boop was created.  Pastor Steve, who runs a great and impressively obsessive pop-culture site was kind enough to let us run this great tribute to the red-blooded "yahoo!" male reactions to the lovely Ms. Oyl.  Tex Avery's cartoons with eye-poppin' howling wolfs popularized this great art form, but the Popeye toons took the reactions to a whole new level. 

So without further adieu, we present, "The Top Reactions To Olive Oyl"

ORIGINAL ANGST!
FANTAGRAPHICS TO REPRINT ALL 50 YEARS OF PEANUTS STRIPS IN MONSTER 25 VOLUME SET!

On April 1st, 2004, Fantagraphics is releasing the 1st edition of what will end up being a monstrous 25 volume set reprinting every Peanuts strip ever made.  Though the work has been reprinted in hundreds of ways through the years, never before have they been chronologically presented in this fashion.  In fact, Volume One will contain many strips that have never been collected before.


As you can see from these panels from the debut year of Peanuts,
Snoopy was making friends with birds 17 years before Woodstock was introduced.

I totally dig the original crisp and innocent style Charles Schulz used in the strip's early years.  He set a standard for strips featuring children that is felt even to this day.  Charlie Brown is the prototype loveable loser, while Snoopy may be the most influential animal to ever appear in the medium.  You simply can't have an Opus, Hobbes, Garfield, or even Marmaduke without Snoopy paving the way.

CLICK HERE FOR THE REST OF THIS ARTICLE
AND A LOOK AT MORE EARLY STRIPS


retroRANDY's
Journal o' Fun

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LOLLIPOP has a swell retroCRUSH writeup that ranks as the best I've seen yet

CRUEL SITE OF THE DAY for 11/01

YAHOO PICK OF THE DAY for our Halloween Costume super gallery on 10/06


 

 


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