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WHERE THE WILD THINGS ARE!

I went to the METREON complex in San Francisco to see a preview
of Paramount's upcoming 2004 films, and was thrilled to see an attraction for
kids based on the Maurice Sendak classic, "Where The Wild Things Are".
It's just a fancy maze and play area full of cool things to look at and do, but
it's remarkably well done, and they even have a Night Kitchen restaurant to eat
in when you're all through (don't try the pancakes, rumor has it some kid keeps
jumping in the batter with no clothes on). It's on 4th and Mission and I
totally recommend stopping by. The adult friendly admission is $4, which
is $2 cheaper than sucker kids have to pay! Here's some photos to enjoy!
BRAZILIAN KIDS SHOW QUEEN SUPREME, XUXA!

Brazilian kids have all the luck! While we get stuck with
kid shows featuring Barney and The Teletubbies, they get to sing songs and dance
with Xuxa! Xuxa's 20 plus years of hosting children's programming full of
singing, dancing, and outrageous outfits that Christina Aguilera would turn her
nose up at, have made her one of the more popular TV stars in the world.
While the US media and press tend to condemn any adult working on a kid's show
if they "fall from grace", Xuxa has endured nude photos, and an affair with John
F. Kennedy, Jr. no worse for the wear. She was even the target of a fan
armed kidnap plot that was brazenly attempted on the set of her show and left 2
members of her crew dead. Xuxa turns 41 on March 7th, and still looks
better than ever! Enjoy this gallery from many stages of her career!
CLICK HERE FOR OUR MUY BONITA
XUXA GALLERIA!
THE LADYKILLERS
THE COEN BROTHERS STUMBLE WITH THIS UNFUNNY MESS

The Ladykillers is a horrible
movie. When I saw the commercials that featured a hyper Tom Hanks made up to
look like some bizarro Colonel Sanders on crack, it just looked bad. And when I
saw that Marlon Wayans was in the cast mugging it up, it looked even worse. But
after seeing that The Coen Brothers were behind it, the wonderful geniuses
who’ve made O Brother Where Art Thou?, Fargo, The Big Lebowski, and other films
that rank among my favorites, I had faith. They had never let me down before.
Until now…
CLICK HERE FOR
THE ENTIRE REVIEW
JAMES AT 44
RETROCRUSH INTERVIEWS LANCE KERWIN

Anybody
who grew up during the 70’s would have had to be living in a cave not to
remember Lance Kerwin. He was a very popular teen heartthrob, but he also was
the star of the classic James at 15, Salem’s Lot, about 11 ABC Afterschool
specials, and over a 130 other movies and TV shows. Lance was kind enough to
talk to us about his career in this exclusive retroCRUSH interview.
CLICK HERE TO READ IT!
DAWN OF THE DEAD
WHEN THERE'S NO MORE ROOM IN HOLLYWOOD...

I’m one of those guys that think you can’t
have enough zombie movies, so amidst the moans from die-hard fans of George
Romero’s “Living Dead” films that viewed the Dawn of the Dead remake as
sacrilege, it didn’t really bother me much. I mean I can understand the
concern. Just like Batman fans felt that Michael Keaton was going to screw it
all up, seeing a modern Hollywood take on one of the most beloved horror films
of all time written by the guy who scripted Scooby Doo would certainly make the
most optimistic filmgoers leery.
CLICK HERE FOR THE REST OF OUR
EXCLUSIVE SNEAK PREVIEW REVIEW
EBONY AND IRONY
A LOOK AT VINTAGE ADS FROM EBONY MAGAZINE

Making fun of 80s culture is like shooting fish in a barrel.
From acid wash jeans to neon headbands, there was no shortage of outrageous
fashion to laugh at. But awkward white kids certainly didn't corner the
market on over the top style, as these ads from some early 80s EBONY magazines
featuring SOUL AIDS and SUPER CURL cream clearly demonstrate. You can
click each picture for a larger version...can you dig it?

Apparently with CC or VO, you're sure to get plenty of VD.

Mmmm, nothing says romance like Malt Liquor flavored champagne!
CLICK HERE FOR MORE NICHE
MARKETING ACTION!
STARSKY AND HUTCH

Starsky and Hutch is the rare movie based on a TV show that
actually worked. Taking a cue from the underrated Brady Bunch films, S&H
doesn't take itself very seriously, and by parodying the time period and genre
from whence it came, it's a hilarious success. What's great is that the
source material is not some beloved show like Star Trek that has some rabid fan
base that "Hollywood better not screw up or I'll be pissed." With the
simple formula of a cool car, 2 random guys, 70s pop culture, and a charismatic
pimp, it's easy to run wild creatively and make a funny movie.
It's really been beaten into our heads about the 8 films Ben
Stiller and Owen Wilson have made together, but I'll grudgingly admit that it's
their chemistry that really makes this film special. Stiller does
the seething bit better than anyone (including a great turn in recent episodes
in HBO's Curb Your Enthusiasm), while Wilson's cocky yet laid back surfer dude
persona is amazing as well.
The
plot, which is inconsequential as it's just an excuse to throw a bunch of funny
physical gags and costume bits together, involves the two uncovering a giant
cocaine sale masterminded by a dealer played by Vince Vaughn, who is solid, and
refreshingly not over the top ala some bad Mike Myers character you would have
expected.
But "over the top" works well in the casting of Snoop Doggy Dogg
(or Snoop Dogg, as he's become in his maturing years) as Huggy Bear.
Perhaps the only risky part of this film was replacing the incomparable Anthony
Fargas, who played Huggy in the original series, which was akin to choosing a
new B.A. Barracus from The A-Team or Kramer from Seinfeld. From the
similarities to his own name, to his natural ability to become one with
pimpness, Snoop takes over the role and makes you forget anyone else ever played
it.
The entire audience I saw it with was laughing throughout, and no
matter how jaded you may be, you'll certainly find a bit or two that'll make you
yuk it up out loud.
It's a shame that Wilson and Stiller work so well together in
this film, and would hardly want to be typecast as "TV shows turned movie
actors", because I would also love to see what kind of magic they could work on
a Dukes of Hazzard film done with a similar angle.
Which by the way, if you're searching for homoerotic
illustrations of Starsky & Hutch,
LOOK NO FURTHER!
Sometimes, the internet makes Baby Jesus cry
retroCRUSH Rating: 4 OUT OF 5
MARTINI GLASSES

DIG THESE VINTAGE EBONY ADS
Here's some great ads from an 80s Ebony magazine that our own
retroRANDY dug up on one of his many thrift store journeys. Can you dig
it? I knew you could!
I added a few more that I took from
THE EXCITEMENT
MACHINE's COLLECTION as well. If you like a lot of the catalogs and other
crazy things like that we have on the site, you'll totally love what they've got
going on!
THE WORST SEX SCENES EVER
A LOOK AT THE MOST UNSEXY SEX
SCENES IN FILM

In the last 30 years, sex has become more and more prevalent in mainstream film.
No longer confined to the world of porn, many erotic sex scenes have found their
way in to very successful Oscar caliber movies. But this is a tribute to
those hopelessly pathetic stumbling bad bits of eroticism that fail to turn even
the most desperate individuals on. Some of these try so hard to be erotic,
but fail miserably, while others feature individuals with the chemistry of
toothpaste and orange juice.
So without further adieu, here we
go...
YOUR FAVORITE SONG PART?

Sure, we all have favorite songs, but
what's your favorite PART OF A SONG? Maybe there's a tune
that's just "OK" to you overall, but the intro, drum solo, closing
vocal, etc... just does it for you like no other. I'd love for
you to email me at
rberry@retrocrush.com and let me know to include in a feature.
Personally, my all time favorite is the closing fiery horn section
in Midnight Oil's "Power and The Passion". About 4 minutes and
40 seconds into the tune, this group of brass comes out of ground
and close the song out in the final minute with screeches that sound
like God is shouting at you. It's probably the coolest ending
to any song I've ever heard. Anyway, lemme know what your
choices are and let's put a really cool article together.
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