I just got a way cool press release
about the re-release of Herb Alpert's catalog I wanted to share:
"Music legend Herb Alpert has struck a partnership with Shout! Factory
to launch the historic Herb Alpert Signature Series. The
long-term reissue program will include many of his most successful
albums, beginning with the classics The Lonely Bull and South
of the Border, and Lost Treasures, a new compilation of
previously unreleased songs recorded, but set-aside, during Alpert’s
most prolific period, 1963-1974. The remainder of the The Tijuana Brass
catalog, as well as Alpert’s acclaimed solo albums, will roll out later
in 2005. Every album in the Herb Alpert Signature Series has
been painstakingly remastered under Alpert’s personal supervision, and
the expanded CD booklets include new liner notes with reflections from
Alpert himself." We'll be giving away some of the CDs and other
special treats soon! And of course, they're also going to
remaster Whipped Cream and Other Delights, which is considered by many
to be the sexiest album cover of all time. Stay tuned. In
the meantime you can listen to some samples of this great music if you
click the link below:
You" from the Lost Treasures CD
Lonely Bull" from The Lonely Bull CD
"The Girl from Ipanema" from the South of the Border CD
EMPEROR OF THE NORTH
A LOOK AT THE BEST HOBO-KILLIN' FILM OF ALL TIME
One day, I got an email from Johnny
Ryan, who had just read my Keith Carradine interview, and he
heartily recommended that I should see a 1973 film he was in called
Emperor of the North. His praise was intriguing:
really terrific. Lee Marvin plays "A#1", King of the Hobos! Ernest
Borgnine is great as the bloodthirsty, hobo-hating train conductor.
And when I say he hates hobos, I ain't kiddin'!! He beats them to
death with a lead pipe if he catches them sleeping on his train. And
he calls them "dirty 'bos". The movie ends, of course, with a brutal
face-off between Borgnine and Marvin on a moving train. Carradine
plays a young, untrustworthy kid trying to learn the ropes of being
a master-hobo from Marvin."
As luck would have it, AMC happened
to be showing it on TV just a few days later, and after seeing if
for myself, I can tell you it's easily become one of my favorite
CLICK HERE FOR MORE
We've got some awesome knockout
surprises in store with some of the world's top modern retro pin-up
stars coming soon to the pages of retroCRUSH! We're so excited
to be continue bringing you the most gorgeous and eye-popping pinups
of the month, including the smoldering Kate from Kate's Pinups, and
the unbelievable Bernie Dexter, with many more to come! Keep
watching this space for more details!
JEFF BARRY (1975)
PERFORMED BY JA'NET DUBOIS and OREN WATERS
The inspirational and funny theme song to The Jeffersons does
everything a good TV theme should; with it's rousing lyrics and
music "Movin' On Up" perfectly sets the theme for the story of
George Jefferson's rise to success with a "deluxe apartment in the
sky!" Janet Dubois, who played Willona on Good Times provides the
insanely good female vocals on this tune. When she screams
"fish don't fry with the chicken, beans don't burn on the grill", I
can't imagine anyone else singing this song. Or can I?
to hear my superior take on this timeless classic (To hear
more of my classic theme renditions,
CLICK HERE to suffer).
I always thought that the show's star, Sherman Helmsley performed
the male vocals, because they sound so much like him, but those
chores were handled by
Oren Waters, who's had a lot of bit parts as singers in various
films. Jeff Barry, who composed the theme, also created the
themes for One Day At A Time and Family Ties. But Barry
is perhaps best known for his non TV songwriting credits, crafting
such all time greats as "Chapel of Love", "Da Do Run Run", "Be My
Baby", "Leader of the Pack" and The Archies' hit, "Sugar Sugar"
(which was originally written for and passed over by The Monkees).
If you'd like to test your knowledge of The Jeffersons theme lyrics,
CLICK HERE. Racist radio show host Rush Limbaugh used to
play the theme song whenever he did a news update on Senator Carol
COMPOSED BY NEIL HEFTI
PERFORMED BY THE MARKETTES
Batman is probably the most effectively simple theme song ever
recorded. With an action packed musical intro that perfectly
accompanies the motions of Batman and Robin running toward the
screen, then punching out crooks, the single word chorus of "Batman"
is repeated throughout. There's no question what show that
song is from. Nearly 40 years after it's debut, kids who
haven't even seen the show seem to know about this song.
Classic TV Themes, Neal Hefti who was known for his catchy,
sophisticated jazz tunes including "Cute", "Lil' Darlin'", "Girl
Talk" from "Harlow" and the "Theme from the 'Odd Couple'" came up
with a decidedly unsophisticated tongue-in-cheek THEME based upon
the 12-bar blues progression; the melody was harmonized using the
unusual relatively dissonant interval of a major second instead of
more typical 3rds and 6ths; so it was a bit "in your face"; But
since the whole camp concept was "in your face" with the cartoon
balloons of "Bam!" and "Ka-Pow!" on the screen, this approach seemed
to work; and the THEME became a pop hit as recorded by Nelson Riddle
and his Orchestra." The theme was twice as heard as many
shows, because they had new episodes TWO nights a week when it first
aired, so you could watch the first part on Wednesday night, then
the next night, "Same Bat Time, Same Bat Channel!" I honestly
can't think of any non-reality based show that's ever done that.
#2 TIE: THE BRADY BUNCH/GILLIGAN'S ISLAND
BRADY BUNCH COMPOSED BY
SHERWOOD SCHWARTZ/FRANK DEVOL (1969)
GILLIGAN'S ISLAND COMPOSED BY SHERWOOD SCHWARTZ/GEORGE WYLE (1964)
themes to The Brady Bunch and Gilligan's Island are like Siamese
Twins in the respect that it's nearly impossible to consider one as
great, without giving equal attention to the other. Sherwood
Schwartz both created the shows, and wrote the lyrics for each.
Both have catchy tunes that have endeared for nearly 40 years.
Both tell you the setup story, so you don't have to know about the
first episode to follow it, and both of them are accompanied with
visuals that show you every single character in the show.
They're the most handy and useful TV themes ever created, if
During the first season, The Brady
Bunch theme was performed by a group called The Peppermint Trolley
Company (who also sang the theme to Love American Style), but
from Season 1 forward, it was done by The Brady Kids themselves.
In fact, if you listen to the themes from each year after that
carefully, you can hear that it was re-recorded as the actors
playing The Bradys got older. Frank DeVol's music was really
nice, and the scene specific music was very charming as well.
I always laughed how there'd be sad, happy, and scary variants of
the main theme to accentuate the mood of the show. If you
ONLINE Brady Bunch Page, scroll down to the media section and
you can listen to all the different version, and even see the video
intros to the horrible Brady Kids and Brady Brides shows, which use
updated variants of the original show's theme.
Gilligan's Island, was Sherwood
Schwartz's first big hit, and is still one of the most popular TV
sitcoms ever made. Composed by George Wyle, the song tells the
dramatic tale of a 3 hour tour that went bad!
There's a very different theme song
with a calypso theme that was used in the pilot episode (with a
different cast of characters that included 2 secretaries and a
schoolteacher instead of Ginger, Maryann, or The Professor) that
never aired. It's very charming, but nowhere close to the one
we've grown to love through the years.
the "official" theme song evolved as the show went on, as it used to
refer to The Professor and Mary-Ann as "The Rest".
SITCOMS ONLINE has
Gilligan's Island page with a ton of cool stuff, and again, you
can scroll down to the media section to listen to all version of the
theme songs, and watch video clips of them, too! According to
this site, the Year One theme was performed by a singing group
called "The Wellingtons", but from Season Two forward it was sung by
a similar sounding group called "The Eligibles". Both of which will
be contenders for the top of our Worst Names For Music Groups list,
if we ever do one!
I had the pleasure of
interviewing Sherwood Schwartz, the creator of both shows, 2
years ago, and asked him to comment about both of these songs.
Both The Brady and
Gilligan's Island theme are easily considered 2 of the best TV songs
of all time. Why do you think so? TV Guide had a contest
about 6 months ago, and Gilligan's Island was the Number 1
theme song, and The Brady Bunch was #7. I had 2 shows
where you had to know the past history to flow in to the show.
Gilligan's Island it was vital, to avoid exposition, you had to
do a song that incorporated the background of the show. The
song always told you the show, that way you get the back story out
of the way and can move right to the action. Exposition is the
enemy of entertainment the more you tell people the more you
HERE FOR THE ENTIRE LIST, INCLUDING THE #1 THEME OF ALL TIME
JOHNNY RYAN'S LATEST ISSUE OF
ANGRY YOUTH COMIX IS A LAFF RIOT!
There's few comic books that I look
forward to anymore. I've read thousands and thousands of them
in my life so I'm pretty jaded against most of the stuff that passes
for "good" in this medium. That's why I totally dig Johnny
Ryan's work with Angry Youth Comix. If you've never heard of
this classic orgy of bad taste and crazy laughs, you don't know what
you've been missing, and the latest issue from Fantagraphics does
Crap covered Smurfs, menstruating
leprechauns, projectile vomiting of miniature vaginas, and beautiful
women made out of puke, and teddy bears that piss Golden Graham
cereal! And each of those are in DIFFERENT stories. In
this special issue, we're treated to 13 different stories starring
the irascible Loady McGee, and his dorky pal Sinus O'Gynus. I
found myself laughing my ass off repeatedly throughout. If
you're in the mood for some good laughs and enjoy truly tasteless
and offensive humor that brings to mind Robert Crumb's crazier
stuff, you should totally check this out! Just go to your
local comic shop, or if you live in Dullsville, visit
retroCRUSH PRO-TIP: You may recall
Johnny as the artist for our first retroCRUSH T-Shirt.
If comic book legend Jack Kirby could
have designed a videogame, I think it would have been a lot like
Vivendi Universal's new multiplayer PC extravaganza, "Freedom Force
vs. The Third Reich". Set during World War II, you can pick
one of 6 Golden Age style comic characters to fight bad guys
representing the old school Axis of evil. It's also full of
tons of mod capabilities, and you can even create your own
character. You can
HERE to see a Quicktime preview of the game, and
CLICK HERE to visit the
official site. It goes on sale March 8th, but if you want to
try your luck at winning a copy, email us at
and let us know what your favorite comic book story you ever read
was. All entries must be received by March 13th. We'll
have a full review up soon! In the meantime,
you can download a playable demo of the game for free if you CLICK
CLICK IMAGE TO SEE THE LARGER VERSION
I was looking through
some old magazine advertisements and came across this gem for "Pursettes"
from 1974. Though it's not signed by him, the artwork looks to
be the work of Mad Magazine legend Mort Drucker.
Heaven forbid a boy finds out that a woman might have a tampon in
her purse! "And you'll like the lubricated tip!" So
ladies, if you'd like to avoid "spilling your secret", get Pursettes!
Despite the cute name, they didn't last very long in stores, which
put an quick end to the expansions from the lineup, Douchettes and
Never before has
there been a more sexually confusing product spokesperson than Miss
Chiquita Banana. Since her first appearance back in 1944, her
appeal has been undeniable, but it's hard to get past the fact that
she's shaped like a banana. What does that say about a man
that's attracted to a banana with lipstick on it? I asked my
therapist about it and he said that I'm just what's known in the
psychiatric community as a "sick bastard". Thank goodness I
didn't tell him about my Sarlacc's Pit and Dune Sandworm obsessions!
Red and blue robots
punch each other really hard
blue head flies to sky
Connect Four, I win!
Pretty sneaky, sis!
Got a good pop culture haiku that
you'd like to share with retroCRUSH? Email it to
The long lost film of South Park creators Trey Parker and Matt
Stone, Orgazmo, is finally coming out on DVD on March 29th!
And it's got enough extras to make their fans go nuts. The
official website promises
extra features like DRUNKEN COMMENTARY. Trust me, if it's
anything as good as the booze influenced commentary from their
THE MUSICAL (which is hands down the funniest DVD commentary
ever produced) it's worth the entire cost of the DVD.
CLICK HERE to read more
about the tons of extras on this great flick, and
CLICK HERE To pre-order your copy on Amazon.
WIN THE WORLD POKER TOUR SEASON
EVEN THE UNABOMBER ENJOYS PLAYING
Poker is certainly
the hot game in America right now (much to the chagrin of the
powerful Parcheesi lobby) and Shout Factory is releasing Season 2 of
the popular World Poker Tour on DVD. We'll be reviewing it
here shortly, but in the meantime, we're happy to be giving away a
copy of the 8 Disc Set and the official World Poker Tour TV Game
from Jakks (pictured below). Just email
and tell us about your most memorable card playing experience for a
chance at winning the DVD set and the game! (1st place gets
their choice). So don't count your money when you're sitting
at the table, 'cause there'll be time enough for counting, when...ah
crap, just enter! Or
CLICK HERE to buy your copy on Amazon.
CLICK HERE TO LISTEN TO OUR
EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW WITH BUTCH
PATRICK from THE MUNSTERS
BAD GIRLS FROM VALLEY HIGH IS ON DVD
Originally released as "A Fate
Totally Worse Than Death" back in 2000, the film (which is one of
late Janet Leigh, and Seaquest DSV actor Jonathan
Brandis' last films) is coming out on DVD on March 22nd. We'll
have a review coming up soon.
CLICK HERE to get your copy pre-ordered on Amazon.
Every time a new Batman movie comes out, I eagerly await it for
months, and become crushed when I actually see how stupid it ends up
being. Hopefully this Summer's Batman Begins ends up breaking
the trend, but in the meantime, you absolutely have to check out
BATMAN NEW TIMES, a wonderfully amazing Batman movie you can watch
online for free using 100% lego style renderings. Not only do
you get the voice of Adam West as Batman, but Mark Hamill reprises
his vocal duties as The Joker, as well!
CLICK HERE to be amazed!
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