RICHARD SALA'S MAD NIGHT IS ONE THRILLING SPOOKY ADVENTURE

Robert Berry
rberry@retrocrush.com

I've never read anything quit like Richard Sala's "Mad Night" before.  The black and white artwork is a mixture of Archie comics and creepy woodcuts and the story is like a Nancy Drew adventure with David Lynch as a guest writer.  In the opening pages, a gorgeous raven haired girl with glasses is quietly exploring her college library when quickly murdered by some dark creepy dude with a mechanical hand who proceeds to extract some fluid from her neck with a hypodermic needle.  He returns to his underground laboratory and uses it to create some sort of mysterious formula.

The twists and intrigue keep on coming throughout the 232 page graphic novel from Fantagraphics which was originally serialized between 1998-2005 in Sala's book "The Evil Eye".  Priced at just over $16, it's one of the more thrilling and original comic book adventures I've enjoyed in quite some time.  An evil puppet lady, an army of sexy pirate girls, a giant killer octopus, and a precocious heroine named Judy Drood who's a great detective with a mean right cross all add up to an exciting story that I'm eager to shortly read again.  If you're looking for something unusual and fun for an adult comic book fan, or someone that just digs a good mystery, you can't do much better than this.  CLICK HERE to look at and buy all of Richard Sala's catalog at Fantagraphics.  Also, visit Richard's site at RICHARDSALA.com for more mysterious goodness.

PAT "MR. MIYAGI" MORITA DIES

The beloved Pat Morita passed away on Thanksgiving Day at the age of 73 of natural causes in his Las Vegas home.  His work both as Arnold on the original Happy Days series, and as Mr. Miyagi in The Karate Kid films were fantastic.  Morita was nominated for a supporting actor Oscar for his work in the first Karate Kid film, which still ranks as one of the most funny, inspiring, and quotable characters in film history.  Morita has more than 100 acting performances to his credit, and even had a stint as a standup comedian in the 60s where he was known as "The Hip Nip."    Here's a neat old article from 1967 about his act at the time. We'll be preparing a nice tribute soon on an upcoming podcast. In the meantime, I'll have a glass of sake in your honor.  I learned a lot about life's confrontations from you as Mr. Miyagi, and your restaurant was never as good once Al took it over.

-Robert Berry
rberry@retrocrush.com

GROSSEST LOOKING CEREAL EVER!

I was at the grocery store the other day looking for some sugary goodness and was startled to see this latest offering from the fine folks at Kellogg's.  How could anyone not think that the box looks like a giant bowl of perfectly rolled up turds?.  All that's missing is some puffed corn to make it the most scat-a-riffic breakfast of all time.  I wonder if perhaps this is some tribute to the company's founder, RJ Kellogg, who was a near crazy health nut who espoused the benefits of frequent enemas.

This sort of thing is the stuff of pop culture legend.  Not since the ill-advised Robin Prince of Thieves cereal, which looked like a bowl of sugar frosted cocks has a cereal looked so foul.  Steve over at The Sneeze was on the same wavelength and picked up on this right away.

You just wonder if this cereal was created on a dare.  I can only imagine a room full of bored cereal scientists wondering, "Hey I bet I could get kids to eat cereal that looks like little pieces of shit!"  Or is this a way for folks to consider carpophagia without all the pesky risks of horrible disease?

Of course, I suppose it's fitting that the backside of the box would be even more repulsive than the front.  Johnny Ryan, known by many in the industry as the Scatmaster of the comic book world, scanned a picture of it and sent it to share with retroCRUSH readers across the universe.

CLICK HERE FOR THE ENTIRE STORY, and MORE CRAZY PIX!

THE SPIDER PIT SCENE
A HISTORY of the LONG LOST SCENE FROM KING KONG
AND PETER JACKSON'S ATTEMPT TO RECREATE IT

The original King Kong is one of America's greatest movies.  Though the versions that have existed through the years have gone through dramatic edits.  In 1938, 5 years after its original release, there was wholesale chopping of over 4 minutes of footage deemed too shocking and violent for the audiences.  We detailed much of this in an article on The Censored Scenes of Kong a couple years back.  Luckily dedicated film preservationists were able to track down those scenes, but there's long been a sequence that was cut after an initial screening by the film's director himself, Merian C. Cooper, that's never been found.  Known as the "Spider Pit Scene", a thrilling segment in which men are eaten alive by various creepy crawly creatures after Kong shakes them from the log into the ravine, had been spoken of by folks who read the script, with only scant evidence of its existence.

CLICK HERE FOR THE ENTIRE EXCITING ARTICLE

STELLA STEVENS

THE RETROCRUSH INTERVIEW

Stella Stevens is best known for her roles as the comic Appassionata Von Climax in Li'l Abner, a kind hearted prostitute named Hildy in The Ballad of Cable Hogue, a retired hooker named Linda Rogot who is married to Ernest Borgnine in The Poseidon Adventure, and a tough Captain Taylor in the all female prison movie Chained Heat.  She's also been in over a 100 other movies and TV shows.

CLICK HERE TO FOR THE STELLA STEVENS GALLERY AND INTERVIEW

THE AQUAMAN ARGUMENT
BY BRADLEY MASON HAMLIN

As a kid in the 1970s, Aquaman became my favorite character in the comics—and his comic book had already been cancelled! I read the back issues and followed his terrific series in Adventure Comics, written by David Micheline, which included the incredibly dramatic death of Arthur, Jr., otherwise known as Aquababy. But most importantly, Aquaman was a founding member of the Justice League of America, the best comic book team ever!

Perhaps the highest achievement of Aquaman, and certainly what made him a household name, was his involvement within animation. Filmation Studios created a truly faithful version of Aquaman for the Superman-Aquaman Adventure Hour in 1967. That’s right, not the Superman-Batman Adventure Hour, Aquaman! The Adventure Hour was my first experience with Aquaman and remains without a doubt the definitive version of the character for me. Later, Aquaman teamed up with the exclusive cast of headliners to form the Super Friends—his place forever cemented in pop culture history.

So, what happened?

CLICK HERE FOR THE ENTIRE ARTICLE, INCLUDING A TON OF COOL PHOTOS, AND A COMPLETE COVER GALLERY OF THE ORIGINAL SERIES


GET RICH OR DIE TRYIN' ISN'T WORTH 50 CENTS

Rappers can sometimes do a great job in movies, but 50 Cent's attempt to follow their footsteps in Get Rich Or Die Trying, to put it mildly...totally sucks. A shitty story, shitty acting, shitty rapping, shitty pacing, and shitty shit shittiness makes this one pretty shitty film.

50 plays himself, only he's called Marcus so they can embellish the truth. He's shot within the first 3 minutes of the film and then there's a flashback scene to his childhood. We're going to spend the next 90 minutes "learning how it all began", or as Fifty would say, "learfing fow fit fall fegan". Half of what he says through those piano key teeth of his is too hard to decipher. A scene where he's talking with his mouth wired shut (from one of his many gunshot wounds) is no more difficult to understand than the lines he delivers prior to that.

50 has about 3 different expressions in the film

1) Angry face with mouth shut
2) Angry face with mouth open
3) Goofy smiley face with big teeth sticking out

Every minute he's onscreen, 50 just seems empty inside.  He looks tough, for sure, but his character just comes off as a hollow shell of a man who's just reading his lines and going through the motions.

CLICK HERE FOR THE ENTIRE REVIEW

If you’ve never seen Dean singing his heart out in the 1990 cult classic Rockula with Toni Basil and Thomas Dolby you’re missing out on a rare treat. He’s also well loved for his role as Chainsaw in Summer School which he says has been in a loop on HBO since 1987. We recently talked with Dean about losing his mind on ALF, hanging with Billy Bob Thornton in a Zombie movie, singing in a rock band about Mr. T, and his thoughts on masturbation.

CLICK HERE FOR THE ENTIRE INTERVIEW

Halloween is always the best time of year at retroCRUSH!  In the past we've given you The 100 Coolest Monsters, The 100 Scariest Movie Scenes of All Time (before Fangoria and Bravo, to boot), and even the biggest collection of Weird Halloween Costumes on the internet!  So we're keeping the traditional alive with a special look at the 100 Greatest Horror Movie Performances.  Once again, we've teamed up with the resident horror geniuses at Trash Film Orgy to put our spooky heads together and come up with a list that really honors the greatest performances in horror movie history. 

CLICK HERE TO SELL ALL 100!

meaningful, and entertaining film.

SELLING FOR CAPTAIN O

To poor comic book readers who couldn't keep up with the stiff inflation rates to continue purchasing Jughead each month, there were many money making opportunities to be had within the pages of the comics themselves!  I sold seeds door to door for The American Seed company, and enterprising young kids could also sell America's favorite newspaper, Grit!  Keith Lowell Jensen explores the pleasures and perils of selling overpriced greeting cards door to door, all in the quest to win "fabulous prizes".

CLICK HERE TO READ IT, AND EARN FAMOUS NAME PRIZES OR CASH

CLASSIC ARCADE GAME SONGS!

I love classic arcade game music almost more than I love Devil Dogs (sorry, Marcia).  And it's the classic games o' the 80s that always have the best music.  Here's a trip down memory lane with the best of them all. 

#10 SPY HUNTER
Featuring a modified synthesizer version of the famous Peter Gunn theme, it really gets you in the mood for hunting spies.  Pretty much all you did in this game was drive down the street and shoot every car you saw, so they might as well have named it "Super Highway Kill Spree" and it would have probably been more appropriate. CLICK HERE to listen.

CLICK HERE FOR THE WHOLE LIST

HELP ME, I AM STUPID!

I screwed up while backing up my email and to make a long story short, lost every single email from the last 4 years!  If you've sent something my way in the last couple months, please be a dear and resend it to me!  I'm especially in need of any photos, article suggestions, and other whatnots.  You can re-send them to rberry@retrocrush.com.  Thanks!  Even just a quick email to re-touch base and say "HI" would be nice so I can get you back in my address book! Especially if you're that guy who sent me pictures of the refurbished Bates Motel! 

 

 
Web www.retrocrush.com

"HOLO" COST? $10!

Comic Book Holocaust 2—the spanking-new sequel to Comic Book Holocaust, published in Summer 2005—is a limited edition comic recently self-published by retroCRUSH's favorite artist Johnny Ryan, which will debut at 2005 Bazaar Bizarre L.A. (Dec. 11, 1-9pm). CBH collects 24 comic book parody strips Johnny has drawn into one gorgeous package, with a display-worthy three-color wraparound letterpress cover produced by Buenaventura Press. Only 200 copies were produced, and each copy is signed and numbered. Various ink colors and papers were used, the pic above is just one sample of what you might receive. (Better pic to come.) Please note that Johnny's last two parody books sold out extremely fast (and CBH I is nearly gone); also these are not available in stores. Only $10. 

CLICK HERE TO BUY YOURS

DVD SOL? UMD 4 PSP  

As a gaming machine, Sony's PSPis a bit on the "ho-hum" side, but it makes for a great way to watch movies on the go.  Lion's Gate passed along a collection of their latest wares for us to giveaway on retroCRUSH.  Just CLICK HERE to email us with your name and address, and we'll randomly choose a winner by Tuesday November 29th!  Good luck.

Our good friend Jenny from sewdarncute.com is sellilng these super cute denim tote bags, and tons of other swell things for the holidays.  Just click the picture above to snatch one up pronto!

BACK IN BLACK

I miss Johnny Cash. 

I'm sad that I didn't see him in concert, especially when he came to Sacramento with his wife and played at the Radisson hotel about 8 years ago, and can't remember what I could have possibly been doing that could have been more important than seeing the man grace the world with his presence.  Johnny Cash is my favorite rock star.  His incredible voice could make a good song magnificent.  More so than Elvis, The Beatles, Stones, or Zeppelin, Cash is what Rock and Roll is all about to me.  Not wanting to follow any trends, just sing fucking good songs.  Johnny knows of the torture, pain, and love we all feel in life.  "Walk The Line" isn't as good as seeing him walk the earth again, but its a great peek into the mysterious and cool life of one of the most badass musicians to ever walk the planet.

CLICK HERE FOR THE ENTIRE REVIEW

GET ON OUR MAP!

Let's see how widespread retroCRUSH fans really are!  Click the map above and you can see the worldwide map of everyone that's checked in so far.  Add your own name and location with amazing ease.   

Phillip Seymour Hoffman is incredible in the new film Capote, in which he dramatizes the title character's visit to a small town to write what would become "In Cold Blood", the world's first non-fiction crime novel. It's in limited release, but its worth the drive if you can find it in a theater near you.  To hear our special "Driving Home From The Movies" review, just CLICK HERE to subscribe to the retroCRUSH Podcast and listen to episode #38. 


artwork by Johnny Ryan, comic genius

VOTE FOR RETROCRUSH
AND SAVE A HOBO!

We've gone on a hobo killing spree, and the only way to stop it is by voting for our podcast at Podcast Alley.  Please help us out, 'cause it'll make us climb the charts and become internet superstars.  Sure, not voting may rid the world of drifters, but if you take the time to vote, I can buy that can of Spaghettios I've been saving for. 

CLICK HERE...IT'S EASY!

COOL FIREFLY LIGHTS!

Not too long ago, I was really missing how cool fireflies looked at night. They don't exist where I live anymore, so in desperation I turned to the internet to see if there was a way to order live fireflies, and release them in my backyard.  I figure one night of firefly magic might be worth it.  They're one of the great nostalgic things from my childhood that I wish I could have again.  Of course, fireflies can't survive a night in a glass jar, let alone UPS shipping, so I came up dry. 

What I did find, though, is a kickass company called Firefly Magic that sells sets of custom made LED lights that you can put in your yard and enjoy the same eerie firefly light effects every night of the year!  I got a solar powered set of 12 lights that I had fully installed within 30 minutes of taking them out of the box.  They're now one of my favorite things, as my friends and I love just staring at them in my backyard at night.  They have the same color and random pulsing pattern as the real thing.  I've got a short video of them in action that you can watch if you CLICK HERE. Give the fine folks at FIREFLY MAGIC a visit and check them out for yourself.  I can't think of a more unusual and rewarding gift you could give.

RETROCRUSH INTERVIEWS

Alison Arngrim TV's "Nellie Olesen" from Little House on The Prairie
Audrey Landers
Brandon Bird pop culture painter extraordinairre
Brian Cutler from TV's Isis
Bruce Campbell cult classic icon
The Chapman Brothers the creators of internet sensation Homestar Runner
Cindy Morgan from Tron and Caddyshack
Drew Curtis creator of FARK.com
Hank Garrett veteran character actor
Jack Hill exploitation film direcdtor
John Waters trash cinema god
Johnny Ryan Angry Youth Comix and Blecky Yuckeralla comic book artist
Judy Landers 80s icon and sex symbol
Keith Carradine star of stage and screen
Lana Wood Bond girl and sister of Natalie
Lance Kerwin James at 15 star
Lloyd Kaufman founder of Troma Pictures
Nichelle Nichols Star Trek's Lt. Uhura
Paul Lekakis "Boom Boom Boom" singer
Pauly Shore 80s comedy icon
Princess Superstar bad girl rapper
Randy Johnson The Village People's cowboy
Ron Jeremy porn star god
Ruth Buzzi comedy icon
Sherwood Schwartz Brady Bunch and Gilligan's Island creator
Susan Powter Stop The Insanity fitness icon
Tammy Faye scandal and cancer survivor
The Unknown Comic Gong Show staple
Tony Jaa Muay Thai Warrior
Tura Satana Faster Pussycat sex icon!


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