http://retrocrush.com/index.php/2010/07/awesome-new-pirates-4-teaser-with-johnny-depp/ the world's greatest retro site Wed, 11 May 2011 02:04:00 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 http://retrocrush.com/index.php/2010/07/awesome-new-pirates-4-teaser-with-johnny-depp/comment-page-1/#comment-706 IlsaSS Wed, 04 Aug 2010 23:20:54 +0000 http://retrocrush.com/?p=1473#comment-706 I just read all about this movie online. Turns out Johnny bought the industrial light and magic studio, that creates the Computer Generated Imagery of Pirates of the Caribbean and had the entire studio airlifted to one of his clandestine Caribbean islands. Where 100% of the movie is created. Johnny never has to interact with another person. He puts on a black suit with hundreds of tiny green balls attached and jumps all around for about an hour. Then he receives an e-mail from the director. "Good Johnny, but this time even more effeminately, remember an army of mermen 10,000 strong is chasing you into a maelstrom of pirañas." After an hour of work it's quitting time, after all, that scene was for Pirates of the Caribbean 17. Ian McShane has it pretty easy as well all his parts were taken from the HBO show Deadwood and re-digitized, so expect a lot of cussing. Now Johnny has even more time to troll around in his 156 foot steam powered boat, that is powered with digital coal. The boat was aptly named Vajoliroja that translates into, "Wino Forever." "Well maybe you can't fight CGI but you can always buy a Retrocrush t-shirt that serves well to soak up the tears of broken cinematic dreams." I just read all about this movie online. Turns out Johnny bought the
industrial light and magic studio, that creates the Computer Generated
Imagery of Pirates of the Caribbean and had the entire studio
airlifted to one of his clandestine Caribbean islands. Where
100% of the movie is created. Johnny never has to interact with another
person. He puts on a black suit with hundreds of tiny green balls
attached and jumps all around for about an hour. Then he receives an
e-mail from the director. “Good Johnny, but this time even more
effeminately, remember an army of mermen 10,000 strong is chasing
you into a maelstrom of pirañas.” After an hour of work it’s quitting time,
after all, that scene was for Pirates of the Caribbean 17. Ian McShane
has it pretty easy as well all his parts were taken from the HBO show
Deadwood and re-digitized, so expect a lot of cussing. Now Johnny
has even more time to troll around in his 156 foot steam powered boat,
that is powered with digital coal. The boat was aptly named Vajoliroja that
translates into, “Wino Forever.”
“Well maybe you can’t fight CGI but you can always buy a Retrocrush t-shirt
that serves well to soak up the tears of broken cinematic dreams.”

]]>